Review: Modern Loss by Rebecca Soffer and Gabrielle Birkner

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Inspired by the website that the New York Times hailed as “redefining mourning,” this book is a fresh and irreverent examination into navigating grief and resilience in the age of social media, offering comfort and community for coping with the mess of loss through candid original essays from a variety of voices, accompanied by gorgeous two-color illustrations and wry infographics.

At a time when we mourn public figures and national tragedies with hashtags, where intimate posts about loss go viral and we receive automated birthday reminders for dead friends, it’s clear we are navigating new terrain without a road map.

Let’s face it: most of us have always had a difficult time talking about death and sharing our grief. We’re awkward and uncertain; we avoid, ignore, or even deny feelings of sadness; we offer platitudes; we send sympathy bouquets whittled out of fruit.

Enter Rebecca Soffer and Gabrielle Birkner, who can help us do better. Each having lost parents as young adults, they co-founded Modern Loss, responding to a need to change the dialogue around the messy experience of grief. Now, in this wise and often funny book, they offer the insights of the Modern Loss community to help us cry, laugh, grieve, identify, and—above all—empathize.

Soffer and Birkner, along with forty guest contributors including Lucy Kalanithi, singer Amanda Palmer, and CNN’s Brian Stelter, reveal their own stories on a wide range of topics including triggers, sex, secrets, and inheritance. Accompanied by beautiful hand-drawn illustrations and witty “how to” cartoons, each contribution provides a unique perspective on loss as well as a remarkable life-affirming message.

Brutally honest and inspiring, Modern Loss invites us to talk intimately and humorously about grief, helping us confront the humanity (and mortality) we all share. Beginners welcome.

Review

Everyone grieves differently on their own time. Have you ever found yourself in a conversation after a tragic loss and someone refers to your grief as "getting over it" or "finding closure" as a way of dealing with things? It can be frustrating leaving you feeling alone or in situations where those around you can't relate because they don't understand to comfort you. Modern Loss, shares a group of people who give their insight on what it means to live with loss.

Modern Loss, stems from the online community started by Rebecca and Gabi. Through their own loss at a young age, they found it difficult to relate to others based based on their demographic. When their community started, it opened the door for so many in their demographic that were living with loss that enabled them to have a place to open honestly about their grief. Not just for them but for so many that have a hard time dealing or talking about their grief, this community setting allows them to openly share their living grief without boundaries. The book driven by stories of personal experiences loss that transcend the everyday folks, celebrities, ages, gender, and religion. You will be inspired, laugh, cry and hopefully feel that you are not alone. 

I thought this was one of those books that make you hopefully appreciate life and look forward to each day. You'll look at grief differently and hopefully have more compassion toward people who are having a hard time dealing with loss or find the strength for yourself if you have been struggling with living with loss. I love what these ladies did with their loss to help others and hope that you check out their book.

Review: Say You'll Remember Me by Katie McGarry

I don't even know where to start but I do know that I read an awesome book. This was the first book that I read by Katie McGarry and by the way, I need to back read now. Another author added to the favorite list but let's chat about her latest, Say You'll Remember Me.

This was definitely one that had me hooked. I loved the characters and the parallel contrast of the lives of Drix and Elle as the story progress really makes you want to root for them. There's nothing better seeing the underdog get that rainbow in the end and nothing sweeter than when love has no barriers and defies society's expected of who should be together.

Hendrix, aka “Drix” is no angel but a second chance at life after he finished a program due to a plea he accepted for a crime that he didn't commit. A situation happened where he at the wrong place at the wrong time. Mistaken identity and a broken system for people like him did him no favors. Thinking that his friend committed the crime, rather than see him suffer, he took the fall knowing that he didn't do. With a lot of time to think about things, getting the answer to that question was on the forefront of his mind but getting those answers may lead him down a road that has potential dire consequences.

As part of the stipulation of the program, Drix was to become the spokesperson of the new program. That meant that he would be attending many events showcasing the benefits of getting a second chance and new start at life. One of the events, Drix happens to meet a girl named Elle. Their chemistry is instantaneous. Now, in any other circumstance, this would be a good thing but Elle wasn't just any ordinary girl, she was the daughter of the governor.

Elle is beautiful and has everything at her fingertips. The media has defined he as the perfect daughter and that expectation of image is expected of her parents. They have rules and expectations to follow and an image to uphold. Drix doesn't exactly fit the mold. As her father's campaign and push for recongition of this new program increases, her parents expectaions get a bit too much. She loses herself and the only person that makes her feel any sort of normalcy is Drix. Each on a search for answers leads them down a path of everything they could've wanted.

Overall, I really liked this book. I really appreciate the perspective of the characters. I liked how Drix being beyond the stereotype that society has on someone like him from that socio-economic background. Sometimes things happen and people change or want a second chance in life. Then when we look at people like Elle who has everything and people adore her on the outside and wish they had her life but it's not the fascade it's made out to be. It was really nice seeing barries broken and two people fight for each other to be better than they were independent and collectively was so bittersweet. Loved the supporting characters. They brought so much value to Drix and Elle. Here's another to add to the TBR list!

Review: All the Lives I Want by Alana Massey

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If I were to write a book, this is the type of book I would write. I’m so fascinated by celebrity culture, and I’ve spent a great majority of my life obsessed with it. It would interesting to see how my life has been impacted by particular moments pertaining to Hollywood and particular cultures.

All the Lives I Want was a good read. At times I did feel that some essays were a little too long and others a little too short, but nevertheless, it was an overall good book. It was entertaining with a wide variety themes.

It was interesting to see how Alana Massey discussed and incorporated different celebrities into her writings. It did not feel force or out of place. She made an effort to connect her experiences with those “famous strangers.” She is well spoken and takes time to do some analyzing. Readers would be able to tell that she had done her research.

She had a wide variety of celebrities who she mentioned. And it was great to see why she had a strong connection to those she had chosen. She mentions everyone from Lil’ Kim to Courtney Love to Sylvia Plath.

Alana Massey was also brutally honest about her experiences and about the public’s perceptions of the celebrities. However, it is worth mentioning that she doesn’t demonize these celebrities or pin them against them against each other. She’s treats them like regular people.

Final Analysis

All the Lives I Want is a well written book that manages to not feel uncomfortable or demonizing. It’s an honest account of a person’s connection to a group of people who happen to be famous.
 

Review: The Promise Between Us by Barbara Claypole White

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Metal artist Katie Mack is living a lie. Nine years ago she ran away from her family in Raleigh, North Carolina, consumed by the irrational fear that she would harm Maisie, her newborn daughter. Over time she’s come to grips with the mental illness that nearly destroyed her, and now funnels her pain into her art. Despite longing for Maisie, Katie honors an agreement with the husband she left behind—to change her name and never return.

But when she and Maisie accidentally reunite, Katie can’t ignore the familiarity of her child’s compulsive behavior. Worse, Maisie worries obsessively about bad things happening to her pregnant stepmom. Katie has the power to help, but can she reconnect with the family she abandoned?

To protect Maisie, Katie must face the fears that drove her from home, accept the possibility of love, and risk exposing her heart-wrenching secret.

Review

This was a tough book. More than likely, when you think of someone with OCD, you probably have an image of a neat freak or someone who has to have things a certain way. Usually, we see the visual aspect of it rather than understand the behavior. The Promise Between Us, really captured and gave the reader an inside look behind someone functioning with this debilitating, no discriminating disease that can have dire affects on someone's life.

I really enjoyed getting in Katie's head. This was a character that you really could dive into and understand. What I thought made the book so compelling was that we constantly see what she is thinking. It gives you a chance to experience along with her thoughts and understand how and why she behaves the way she does as a result of a situational trigger. You really get an inside view of what it is like living with someone who has this. In Katie's experience, post partum depression kicked in which ignited her symptoms. Much of her behavior stemmed from genetics but life scenarios triggered different behaviors that affected her quality of life. At the time, she didn't know what she was dealing with and found herself agreeing to leave her child. That was such a hard decision but through some circumstances and fate, their paths cross which give her a second chance at life which allowed her to not only help herself but her daughter.

I'm sure there so many people out there who have experienced this and thought they were going crazy but you're not. I applaud the author for developing a story around a subject that people have assumptions about that usually are negative. This really enlightened and showed the positive outcome that can happened given the strength of the person to persevere and find ways that work for you life to manage and function better. We see her face her past and present and find love despite all the inner battles fighting her to let her know she can have a happy life and nothing will happen bad. 

Overall, I really enjoyed the journey and thought the story was one that was inspiring and really gives you a up, close and personal experience of someone who is experiencing this cognitive disease. A story of loss, reconnect and finding one's own true path really captivates and will soften your heart with compassion. I would add this one to your TBR!

Review: Uncharted by Julie Johnson

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This book gave me all the feels. I was happy. I was sad, and I even shed tears. Uncharted was an emotional rollercoaster that I didn’t expect. This is not a book full of fluff. It’s dark and raw. You can’t help but cry. Julie Johnson pulls no punches, she goes there without even flinching.

The details were incredible and it really feels like your experiencing the pain that the characters are going through. The story isn’t rushed. It takes its time and allows for you to experience the moments and the struggles. For example, there was one scene in particular that I had to stop and take a breather because I felt the physical pain that one character was going through.

Uncharted is a story about strangers who survive a plane crash and end up stranded on an uninhabited island. It’s a story about survival. It’s a story about love. It’s a story about finding yourself and having strength. It’s full of unexpected plot twist.

Although I spend the majority of reading the book holding my breath and close to tears, I really enjoyed this story. It was something that I’ve never read before, and also something that I will never forget. I feel like I could read it again sometime down the line.

I was a little upset when it ended, because there was so much more story to tell. And I do hope that Julie writes more because I wanted to know what happens to Violet and Beck next.

Characters

Violet was great character. I appreciated her drive and reasoning for wanting to escape her town. I do wish that there was a little more mentions of her father in the latter half of the book. He was mentioned a lot in the beginning, and I had hoped that he would have a stronger influence throughout the whole book.

It was interesting to see Beck and Violet grow from sort of enemies to eventually friends who literally have to count on each other to survive. Both Violet and Beck brought so much to the relationship and were a great team.

I do want to take a brief moment to mention the supporting characters. I won’t get into much details because of spoilers. But it is worth mentioning, that although they had a small presence and few scenes they left a lasting impact. I felt a connection to them.

Final Analysis

Unchartered is full of angst. Tissues are a must while reading. It’s a strong story with strong characters. 

Review: The Chalk Man by C.J. Tudor

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First mistake, I started reading this book before I was heading to bed. I'm one of those people who gets scared very easily. After the prologue, rather than sleep with one eye open, I thought it was the best idea to continue reading during the day. This was definitely a welcomed departure from my usual reading and yes it made me look over my shoulders a couple of times but so glad that I took a chance because it was definitely a page-turner.

This isn't one of those books that I really can dive into and give you details because I don't want to take away from the experience by revealing anything that could take away from your experience. You will see from the intricate plot that author paid attention to detail as well as has a gift for storytelling bringing the readers characters that you will be intrigued be absorbed by. Leaving me a little scared with the covers pulled up to my eyes (I jumped to the ceiling at the faintest sound of boo) challenged and haunted my thoughts of her gorgeous story, pushing me to grip the pages, eagerly anticipating the answers to this haunting thriller. 

Told through dual perspectives of the past and present, the author gives the reader a well balanced story that feeds you all that you need to know that fuels your hunger for more to get the answers you crave to find out. That ending was so unexpected and just wrapped up this book brilliantly. There isn't one character in this book that didn't have some relevance to the plot intricately and that's pretty fantastic. Even though this doesn't follow into the usual genre that I read, there was something that piqued my curiosity to just go for and I'm so glad that I did. Overall, I thought it was a great story to dive into and are recommending to add it to your tbr.